Whither the Trolls

This weekend is the second round of that annual obsession, March Madness.

And if you look anywhere online you can find fans following their teams and the people who denigrate those who like those teams. It’s a part of online culture that all of us have experienced in one way or another. Look anywhere where someone likes something, whether it be building LEGOS, fan fiction, sports or gaming and you will find someone else out there to shit on someone’s love. There is even a name for these people – trolls.

If you enjoy Taylor Swift’s music, there is someone out there who will make fun of your fanaticism. If you comment on a news story with thought, someone will more than likely tell you that you are an idiot and should kill yourself. If you have written a book – an experience that takes time and effort – some troll will take a crap on it.

This is something everyone knows. Some like to scrap and will fight back against the trolls. These folks are eternal optimists. When they discover that you can’t fight with a troll and any sort of fighting back turns into entertainment for anyone else watching from a distance. The result is that another troll has been created.

No one likes to feel powerless against a bully and the easiest route to deal with that humiliation is to become a bully yourself. Now, it seems like just about everyone fronts an aggressive stance online, and in real life. We are a culture that is aching for a fight, where anything that happens to us is an ever increasing microaggression that could escalate into real aggression.

None of this is surprising or new. We are all well aware that online behavior has gotten coarser and that it had long ago spilled over into the real world. We’ve all seen the videos of people losing their shit and going viral for their problems. That begs the questions as to why people don’t behave better in public knowing that everyone now has a video camera and a social media account.

Still, I know the frustration and anger of the pizza shop messing up an order and the apathetic response from the kid behind the counter. Behind every “Karen” video are people having bad days. We usually don’t know the whole story, and, if we are honest with ourselves, we probably don’t care.

As humans, we are hardwired to divide ourselves into tribes. In the past, those tribes were usually limited by geography, but that is no longer necessary. You can meet with like-minded people online instantly, which in many large ways is very cool. It has given us the ability to connect with other members of our tribes without geographic barriers. If you could ignore the dark side of the internet and social media, it would be just fine.

But we are humans and we thrive on conflict. We need it and if you look at our entertainment whether it be books, television shows, movies or gaming, the basic element is a conflict and we’ve normalized rooting for the bad guy.

Still, I have not come here to criticize those things. Everyone has a right to enjoy what they want to enjoy. My problem is the lengths people will go to shit on someone else’s enjoyment of something. I may not understand why someone may be a fan of the Kardashians, but if that gives your life meaning, go nuts.

I wasn’t always that way. I used to be happy making fun of people for being a fan of something. Then I kind of realized that if even if I know that I could easily find myself the target of criticism for what I liked, maybe if I became more accepting and empathetic about what other people enjoyed it could make a difference.

So I decided to not shit on anything that anyone enjoys, as long as it is legal and within my own moral code, you won’t find me trolling anyone about it. Actually, you won’t find me trolling anyone, or even posting that much at all. As far as I can see, this has had no impact on anyone’s life but my own. It actually has opened me up to new experiences and some interesting conversations.

I’ve begun to understand a little bit why people become fans of something. It’s like this – the world can be a pretty depressing place and, as individuals, we all need something that gives us a bit of happiness. If that something is a pop singer, or a basketball team, or video game, or whatever, why should I give you a hard time for that?

Enjoy yourself, I say, and please don’t give me a hard time if I don’t share that fanaticism. I’ve got my own thing going on.